• October 20, 2020

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marriage matchmaking

There are various reasons for the delay in marriage. This delay affects both the male and female. As a result of this delay, some believers acting under pressure will subscribe to marriage matchmaking.

Marriage matchmaking is as old as the creation. This began with God bringing Eve to Adam for marriage. This form then has continued in various cultures. Today, the system has been modernized into what is known as online dating, sites, services, or online matchmaking.

What is matchmaking?

Marriage matchmaking is the process of facilitating a relationship or an affair between two people to get married. In recent times, various methods are adopted to facilitate this relationship. These include horoscope, age, and birthday permutations. Scientifically, marriage councilors or marriage facilitators use likes and compatibility to match two people together.

What is a delayed marriage?

Delay in marriage means different things to different people. What causes delays in marriage also differs. Nevertheless, delay in marriage is considered as when a man or woman appears to have passed the expected time of marriage.

Though there are no fast rules to when it is appropriate for a person to get marry. This is because there are many variables when a person should get married. So a person believed he or she had a delay when the person cannot get the right person to marry when he believed he or she is ready for that stage in life.

What is the biblical and cultural fact about marriage matchmaking?

I will quickly refer to a few examples of marriage matchmaking in the bible. Adam and Eve, Isaac and Rebecca, Jacob, Leah and Rachael, David and Michal, and the marriage of the Benjamites. Genesis 2:20-25, Genesis 24:1-66, 29: 1-31, 1 Samuel 18: 27:

Something a friend, a close ally, a pastor, or a senior spiritual acquaintance can be the one that will facilitate a marriage relationship between two people. I am not talking about matchmaking here. You may need someone to call your attention to a brother or sister in the fellowship that has your needed qualities.

In Isaac and Rebecca’s case, it was Abraham’s servant that brokered the union, Saul facilitated the marriage between David and Abigail. God was the marriage matchmaker in the case of Adam and Eve. Rebecca, instructed his son, Jacob, to marry only from her lineage while the Elders of Israel arranged wives for the remaining men of the tribe of Benjamin.

In bible time and most early cultures, parents literally handpicked wives for their children. That may be on cultural, social, religious, and economic preferences. Sometimes, they use this to cement their friendship or promote their business empire.

Interestingly, most of the children naturally come to terms with the arrangement without questioning. By record, most of this union and arrangement prospered. In my observation, the common denominator for the success of those marriages is they have similar religious backgrounds. In other words, a child of God should marry a fellow child of God.

The negative side of marriage matchmaking

Matchmaking is wrong because of the complexity and dynamics of today’s world. What makes it wrong today is the rate of deceitful and false Christians among the folks (wolves in sheep’s clothing).

Today’s preference among young people is different as well. Also, choosing a life partner should be the right of the two people because they will live together for the rest of their life. So they know what is good for them. What matters to people of old is different from today’s young people.

What if you choose to access the option of marriage matchmaking?

Once again, I do not subscribe to matchmaking. But at best, a trusted pastor, friend, parents, colleague, etc. can facilitate a relationship between two people. After that, they should be allowed to pray, discuss, and build the relationship. However, the outcome depends on the two of them without the unsolicited influence of the link person.

Don’t forget God was the first marriage matchmaker, but left the final decision of acceptance or rejection of Eve to Adam. Genesis 2:20-25.
We should not also forget that the success or otherwise of a marriage, whether they are matched made or not depends on God’s grace and the price the couples are ready to pay.

Beloved, there is no shifting ground on marrying only a Christian. Marriage is one decision you cannot compromise if you want to fulfill your destiny. A Christian must marry a Christian.

As I close, the intermediary in marriage facilitation does the introduction, while both of them decide what happens thereafter. How it turns out depends on the two of you based on the leading of the Holy Spirit.
Let me know what you feel about marriage matchmaking in the comment box. Don’t forget to like my Facebook page, share the post, and subscribe to my weekly updates.


Joseph Akinrinola
I am joseph Akinrinola. A pastor, teacher, author, freelance, and incurable learner. I share as I learn insightful ideas that make up a total being physically, spiritually, and emotionally especially, about young people.

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